I wrote in here a while ago about my BFF being a good egg, talking about how she is eager to give a compliment...a sincere compliment, and how that inspires me to want to blurt out the good things I see in others because it does a world of good for those who hear it.
Right now this BFF, Maryann, is doing something I can't and don't want to imagine. She is sitting by the man she loves, watching him die. He was diagnosed with cancer about a week and a half ago, given "weeks to live" a couple of days ago, and the day after that was told "it may just be days." Apparently this form of cancer is extremely rare, aggressive, and there are zero treatment options available.
The kicker of all of this is that as she sits there with his mom and dad, she writes a journal full of compliments on a website. She writes about her boyfriend, Tim, his strength and dignity in wrestling with death. She writes about hospice and the doctors and nurses, about how amazing and kind they are... She writes thank yous upon thank yous to people who have simply baked a pie or taken five minutes to write some kind words to Tim.
The other kicker is that Tim's mom, as she watches her son die, also writes about others' kindness, about the words from friends, from people she has never met... she writes about the "surprising sweetness" of being able to read the kind words of those love her son, the kind words we only write in the face of death.
I've been reading them too. Reading through the really cool things that others have to say about Tim. Reading through great tributes and thank yous and kind words and compliments, and I wonder, why do we wait until it might be too late for kind words?
The situation reminds me that there is no reason to keep kind words to ourselves. There is no reason to keep compliments and encouragement from others.
As always, I want to be like Maryann when I grow up. She is patient and kind and show tremendous strength in the most difficult situations.
I think maybe I will tell her that right now.
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